Parallel Visions

Auris M. Vanderbilt

Can you name America’s largest youth development organization – empowering nearly six million young people ages 5 – 18?  Here are some clues:   a) a belief in the power of young people, b) “engaging youth to reach their fullest potential”, and c) the four leaf clover emblem.  If you guessed the 4-H Club, you are correct!

This past week The Westmont Montessori School was proud to participate and sponsor the Morris County 4-H Fair – an annual tradition during the 3^rd week in July at Chubb Park, Chester, NJ.  What struck me once more this year, as I engaged with the volunteer staff, the visitors, and the other non-profit organizations present at the event, was the similarities between Dr. Maria Montessori’s vision and 4-H’s vision.  Both founded over 100 years ago, both equally committed to supporting children learn real-life skills that prepare them for the next stage of their life, both believing in the individual’s potential, and both supporting innovative thinking as a means to shape the young and how they will improve the world in the future.  With this parallel vision, to encourage children to think for themselves, to discover, to question, to create, to lead and to collaborate, the world is in good hands.   

To find out more about 4-H please visit www.4-H.org .

Some "Magic Words" to Stop Tantrums before they Start

The job of the child is to explore the world and discover how he fits into it. To do this, he will test the limits of his environment and see what happens. Just as a scientist reproduces an experiment over and over again to ensure they have come to the correct conclusion, so too does the toddler.

As parents and educators, it is our role then to provide an environment that has consistent boundaries and expectations, as there is nothing quite so frustrating to these "young scientists" as experiments that provide different results with each trial.

With consistency in place, there are some key phrases that can help to ease the initial push-back that is sure to ensue when your toddler is met with a task they are less than eager to attend to. It's important to never ask a question that offers an unacceptable answer.

• Instead of, "Do you want peas?"
• Try, "Do you want one spoon of peas or two?"

• Instead of, "It's time to leave, okay?"
• Try, "We will be leaving in 5 minutes, so you have time to go on the slide three more times!"

Giving a direct "no" answer to a child or giving a direct order can have the effect of igniting a tantrum, so a quick change of subject with a question is a good way to avoid this.  

• Instead of, "No, you can't have candy".
• Try, "We are not buying candy today, but should we have strawberries or popsicles for dessert tonight?

• Instead of, "It's time for bed. Let's go brush your teeth"
• Try, "It's time for bed. Should we brush teeth or put pajamas on first?"

And when tantrums do begin, they can often be calmed with reassurance that you understand their frustration. 

• Instead of, "Stop crying. You have to clean up before playing."
• Try, "I understand you don't want to clean up. You can go play as soon as you put your toys away."

The true key is to respect that when a toddler is having a tantrum it is because she is feeling true frustration. By giving her clear boundaries, providing options, and keeping your cool you can help her to manage life's frustrations and learn from them. 

The Family That Eats Together........

The expression most commonly used is ……stays together, yet it means much more than that.  Today, family life is busier than ever.  Even with summertime schedules parents are still getting children to and from activities: swim team, ball games, babysitters, camp, etc. The down days of summer are not always as carefree as we want.

It is well documented that families that spend time together tend to have stronger connections and meal times can be a good time to do this. Below is an excerpt from an article from a family education website, offering some tips and support for the importance of doing what you can, when you can, to keep the conversation going.

Why Eat Together?

Family meals are much more than a time for children to sit at the same table with siblings and parents. Children crave ritual and family meals are a part of a routine they can count on and take comfort in. Mealtimes may be one of the only parts of the day when children get to talk with their parents without a lot of other distractions, including the television, cell phones, texts, games and homework.  In fact, research shows dinner conversation boosts a child's vocabulary, which could translate into improved academic performance down the line. Lingering at the table to talk allows you to catch up on what's happening with your children. Go around the table and encourage each child to tell the rest of the family about his/her day.

Breaking bread with your children allows them to model your behavior, which is necessary for instilling good manners. Eating together offers children the chance to see their parents eat a variety of foods, too.

It's not always possible for all family members to be together at every meal. Don't worry about not being there all the time. Experts say that while eating family meals together fosters closeness and development, time spent together is what really matters.

Source: life.familyeducation.com

Westmont’s Legacy

A few weeks ago we graduated our Kindergarten Class of 2016 here at Westmont.  As our students move on from toddler, to preschool, to Kindergarten and to schools beyond these levels, we could not be more proud of our community of learners.   As an educational stepping-stone for several generations, we feel a sincere and deep connection to all the capable young people and their families who began their life journey here.  Westmont’s alumni are, at the core, Westmont’s legacy.  

As the core develops from young children to young adults to fully grown adults with children of their own, we look to continue our support of and our connection with our alumni as they progress in their academic and life journey. 

Fostering this unique relationship has helped us develop, shape, and enhance some wonderful opportunities to encourage their continued involvement with the school thereby advocating a life-long love of learning in accordance with The Westmont Montessori School’s mission.  Whether it is returning to read as an elementary school child to old friends, visiting their former classroom or teacher, participating in the Jr. Camp Counselor Program, applying for the Legacy Scholarship, joining the Baby Sitting Team, attending our workshop on building the “Extraordinary Extracurricular List,” or having their own children now attend Westmont, the connection is life lasting for our Westmont family.

Creating a Montessori Home

By Melanie Thiesse

Although the Montessori Method of learning requires a specifically prepared environment and a whole community of learners, there are key principles that can be carried over to the home. 

Follow the child - Try to build on the interests that your child already has. Whether he is fascinated by dinosaurs or learning to climb the stairs, support and encourage those interests by providing safe and enriching opportunities to grow.

Give freedom to explore - Children learn best through exploration. The more opportunities they have to explore, the more they learn and develop. So let your toddler empty the Tupperware cupboard, take your preschooler on nature hikes, and allow your child to play, imagine, and create a world of their own in the backyard.

Emphasize practical life skills - As humans, we take great pride in our accomplishments. As children, those accomplishments include practical skills that were once challenging but with practice come with ease. Let your child help with dinner, sort laundry, and set the table. The pride they will feel will be well worth the extra time the tasks take to complete. 

Provide child-sized tools - Imagine trying to cook using utensils that are two or three times larger that typical: too large for your hands, too long and hard to balance. In order to promote success, try to provide your child with tools that are the right size for them. This can include utensils, cups, broom and dustpan, laundry basket, anything that your child uses to complete her tasks.

Demonstrate how to do activities - Even the simplest tasks that we may take for granted often require explanations to our children when learning to do them. So, while completing tasks for and with your child, tell them what you are doing. For example, if your child needs help zipping their coat, talk them through the steps while you do it. Talk about how you look for the bottom of the zipper sides, how the two pieces slide together, check to see if the one side is all the way at the bottom, and how you hold down one side of the coat while you pull the zipper up. There are so many learning opportunities all around us!

Create an orderly environment - Rather that the traditional toy box with toys piled on top of toys, provide small shelves for your child to keep their things. Have a place for each item and let your child help with their arrangement. If there are too many toys to fit on the shelves, put some things up and rotate them out.

My son, Nathan (now 16 years old), in his bedroom at age 2

Young Leaders

It is a known fact that if you desire a behavior you role model it, and if you want to reinforce you own learning how better to do it than by teaching someone else.  According to Stephen Covey, (2006) you really do not know something until you can teach it. The third year in a Montessori classroom serves an important role in the development of the child be it a 3-6, 6-9 or 9-12 program, it completes the cycle and serves the specific plane of development for each child

We recently graduated our third year class; in Westmont’s case our Kindergarten class, the final year in our school. We saw clearly what an amazing leadership experience each child had in the areas of social, emotional, and cognitive development.  The foundation of the preceding years’ experiences culminated in community minded, disciplined, self-assured leaders.   No longer the younger members of the community, they reached the pinnacle.  What an honor to be entrusted with the responsibility to role model appropriate behavior, give lessons to peers and younger students, and understand the importance and impact of making good choices.  An opportunity to inspire, teach, take ownership and be admired by younger children should be a natural and regular occurrence.

Sending children on to new schools armed with leadership skills at such a young age is empowering, life lasting, and invaluable.

Reference

Covey, S. The speed of trust: The one thing that changes everything. New York: Free Press 99. 

Summer Memories

As the warm sun begins to warm our backs, we quickly harkened back to summers past.  Summers filled with childhood memories of sand, surf, carnivals, road trips, summer camp, backyard barbeques, catching fireflies, park playgrounds, stick ball, ice cream, etc.   With these cherished memories in hand, we try to re-create those same summer memories for our children, and then some.  

As we steadfastly forge ahead and plan for summer, be it at the shore, in our back yard, at summer camps, playing lawn games, family picnics, there will be the inevitable times a child will bemoan the long lazy days of summer while echoing “I’m bored.”  No fear!  Children need to experience and engage in that which is equally as important:  unstructured time.  It is at these times that children are challenged to explore and discover things on their own, which may lead them to build a fort in the backyard, make monsters out of cardboard boxes, organize playing ‘house’, set up a lemonade stand, etc. thereby creating their own favorite summer memories.

Summer IS a special time of year for you and your child and providing a balance between structured weeks of activities, interspersed with weeks that have less structure will make for some wonderful summer experiences.

Here’s wishing you a long summer filled with wonderful memories